What is Deadmau5? Turns Out it's Exactly as Weird as You Think.

We all know who Blue Rodeo and Nickelback are, but if you're anything like me (and for your sake, I really hope you're not because I think I might be mildly insane) then you're getting a little glassy-eyed trying to identify some of the folks who will be at the Juno's this Sunday. Well never fear, for I have the power of Google and I'm here to help you wind your way through the maze. Join me, won't you, as we learn about some of the Canadian musicians that we might not be all that familiar with.......yet........


City & Colour

At first glance, you would assume this is the name of a band. That's what I thought anyway. But nope -- it's just one guy. His name is Dallas Green. Get it? City & Colour. Dallas Green. Clever. And his music's pretty good. Plus, he has a crap-tonne of tattoos:

Classified

That is his name. I don't mean that his name is classified information -- I mean that is his name: Classified. I don't think that's his birth name. Hold on -- I'll go ask Google...................

.......................I'm back. His real name is Luke. I figured his mom didn't name him Classified. That would be pretty weird. He's a rapper from Nova Scotia. And he has an album called 'Handshakes and Middle Fingers.' He wears his hat crooked a lot.


F****d Up

I hope these guys win an award, because it will make me laugh when the person announcing the winner has to say "And the winner is........F****D UP!!!!!"

They are a hardcore punk band, which explains why I've never heard of them before.

F****d Up played at a music festival in 2009 in a village called F***ing, Australia. I am not making this up. This is real. It was called the Festival of the F*** Bands, and featured such musical acts as Holy F***, F***, and F*** Buttons. Seriously. I am not making this up.

I would put a picture here of them, but I'm afraid of what I will find if I do a Google picture search for 'F****d Up.'


JRDN

I feel bad for JRDN, because he does not have any vowels. Or maybe he did have some, and he lost them. Or maybe he had irritable vowel syndrome, and he had to have them removed.

I just looked up a picture of him. Here, look at it:

He's very good-looking. So good looking, that I don't even care what kind of music he sings. I just wanna look at him for a while.


Deadmau5


For a long time, I insisted on calling this guy "Deadmau Five." I figured if he wanted to spell his name weird, then I was gonna say it weird.

It is actually pronounced "Deadmouse." Morbid. Also, I had a dead mouse in my basement once and not even one person wanted to some see it, so I don't know why he thinks this is a good name.

His real name is Joel, and he's from Niagara Falls. He does the music that has records that get spun around and go "wokka wokka scratch scratch." And he wears a big mouse head on his real head.

I don't get it. And I'm going to have nightmares where that is coming after me.

Zombie Apocalypse, ad pw, and Spider Baby

Scrolling through my emails today, I realized that the best parts of some emails are the subject lines. These are actual subject lines of emails I have received over the last week or so.


"Your Invited"

- Wrong 'your,' dipstick. DELETE.


"Zombie Apocalypse"

- Intriguing, but I'm not sure I should open this. I'm pretty sure it's spam, but am I ever gonna feel stupid if it's a legitimate warning.


"Programa Especial Pascoa-Santare"

- I don't know what that means.


"Homis Controle e Instrumentacao"

- Don't know what that means, either.


- Este fin de demana en Zaragoza"

- Isn't Zaragoza a kind of cheese?


"Fly Fish Northern Spain"

- No thank you.


"100 Rooms at a rate of $19"

- Is this an hourly rate? Because I ain't that kind of girl.


"Satisfy your afternoon 'snack' attack"

- Putting 'snack' in quotation marks makes it seem dirty.


"Payroll Time Sheet"

- WOO HOO!!! I'm getting paid this week!


"O curso mais aplicado"

- I opened this one because 'curso' made me think it might have swear words in it. It didn't. Disappointment.


"RE: IMPORTANT"

- Doubt it.


"We can each make the choice never to be sick again"

- Sure -- if I seal myself in a bubble and never leave the house. Since beer and candy live in stores and not in my house, that doesn't seem like something I'm likely to do.


"ad pw"

- This one looks legit. I should open it and send them money.


"Spider Baby"

- This one was a picture of Spiderman dressed up as a baby. Best email of the week.

The Most-Loved Toy From My Childhood........Only Different

When I was a kid, I played with My Little Ponies to the point where my parents probably should have had me checked by a brain doctor. I've seen them making a comeback over the last few years, which is difficult for me. Difficult because as a grown woman, I probably shouldn't play with My Little Ponies. I'm struggling with the idea of pretending to buy them for non-existent nieces, and then just bringing them home and playing with them myself.

OR, I will start ordering these ones online..........

Avatar (I don't care about the movie, but these look COOL)

Ponycow!!!

No freaking way. Nothing this cool should exist.

I. Am. Ironpony. Na Na, Na Na, Na Na, Ironpony.

Johnny Depp: Adorable even in pony-form.

Kruger Pony will get you when you sleep.....

McPony

Edward Scissorhooves

Darth Pony

Pony Yoda: Awesome, it is.

Riddle Me This.....

I like riddles. They make me feel smart, even though there is a very distinct possibility that I'm not (I'm basing that on the fact that for the THIRD TIME THIS WEEK, I have managed to open the freezer door on my fridge directly into my face. You'd think I'd learn after the second time, but nooooooooooo.)

Here, for your riddling pleasure, are a few of my favourites. If you think you know the answers, email me at melanie@939bobfm.com or send me a message on Facebook. I have absolutely nothing to give you if you're right, I just want to see what your answers are :)

I'll come back to this post in a week or so, and put up the answers. And, of course, the names of everyone who got the answers so Bragging Rights can be claimed!


1. I am the beginning of the end, and the end of time and space. I am essential to creation, and I surround every place. What am I?

2. What always runs but never walks, often murmurs, never talks, has a bed but never sleeps, has a mouth but never eats?

3. What is in seasons, seconds, centuries and minutes but not in decades, years or days?

4. What English word has three consecutive double letters?

5. You throw away the outside and cook the inside. Then you eat the outside and throw away the inside. What did you eat?

6. How far will a blind dog walk into a forest?

7. What happens when you throw a yellow rock into a purple stream?